Like. I’m a firm believer that porn online shouldn’t be within kids reach (those “are you 18” checkboxes for life) but. Like. Ok first of all, just ban cp? It’s not hard? Cp is what got you into this mess just ban it. Second of all, you could increase the age of sign-up from 13 to 18. Third of all, you could do what deviantart does and just. Require birthdays at sign-up. If your blog is flagged as nsfw, you can’t interact with minors. You want to follow an nsfw blog? Prove you’re an adult. You’re an adult but don’t want to see nsfw content? Safe search (that actually works).
It’s not hard to make a functioning website, but staff doesn’t seem to want to do that.
“But people lie about their age” YEAH PEOPLE LIE ABOUT THEIR AGE TO DO ALL KINDS OF SHIT. WHEN I WORKED AT THE GROCERY STORE PEOPLE LIED ABOUT THEIR AGE TO GET BEER. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? WE DIDN’T BAN ALL BEER, WE REQUIRED AN ID CHECK, YES, KNOWING THAT SOME PEOPLE WOULD LIE. BECAUSE THE FAULT WAS THEIRS BECAUSE THEY LIED.
It’s not even “we’re banning all beer”. It’s more like “we’ve set up an algorithm to flag potentially suspicious drinks at checkout for banning, an algorithm that has already caught three papayas, a snickers bar, and Terry the bag boy who got a little too close to the cash register on Tuesday.”
Meanwhile an actual gang of fucking Nazis has set up camp in the produce aisle, and the manager is pretending not to notice them because he thinks they might buy something one of these days.
adulthood is just a constant struggle of, “man, i want cookies for breakfast, but I also recognize this is a bad nutritional decision. On the other hand, the only one who can stop me is me. i know that fucker’s weaknesses. i could totally take me in a fight.”
frog and toad are my two remaining brain cells struggling to keep my horrible body alive
The other day I went to McDonald’s with my family and the guy who took my order was really loud and was basically like “HAPPY HOLIDAYS WHAT CAN I GET YOU” and I was like wow I can’t let this guy outmatch me so I yelled “I’LL TAKE A HAPPY MEAL WITH THE NUG NUGS IF I MAY” you know, like a natural well-adjusted epitome of adulthood 19 year old and he was like “CERTAINLY WOULD YOU LIKE THE MIGHTY KIDS MEAL INSTEAD WITH EXTRA FRIES” and I was so sleep deprived I essentially blacked out and apparently leaned over the counter like I was robbing the place, raised my eyebrow like a suave robin hood and said “HECK YES I WOULD GOOD SIR” and then I sat down and he yelled from across the store “WOULD YOU LIKE THE PURPLE OR BLUE SPIDER-MAN” and since purple is the more superior color that’s how I answered and long story short my parents think college changed me and that I’m now the poster child for being social and I’ve only been asked once why I’m not in a relationship yet but I know it’s gonna be brought up again and how do i tell my parents it’s because whenever I eat in the dining hall I spend the entire time playing bumper cars with the wheeley chairs and all I eat is pixie sticks and the last time I was in the library (where I’m supposed to work next semester, deAr GoD) I ripped my leggings in the bathroom pulling up my pants and I walked the entire 20 mins back to my dorm with my neon underwear peeking out from the holes like a 17th century harlot with a cocaine addiction and I’ve essentially been living off jars of peanut butter and the soundtrack to the bee movie for the past year
there’s more information in this post than there was in the library of alexandria
some of y’all have never tried to fit your hand inside a pringle can, you can get your hand like 4 inches into the can, but then you have to tilt the can into your mouth, but then you have to tilt the can into your mouth, but then a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can so they all go spilling onto your face, and it really shows
